I’d give you everything I’ve got for a little peace of mind
Posted: March 11, 2012 Filed under: expats, family, getting married, Reflections, work | Tags: family, life, work 5 Comments »Putting aside the fact that in another time in another place we could have hated each other – I wish I’d met my wife a dozen years earlier.
While I’d be naive to think that there wasn’t some connection between settling down and getting older, the responsibilities that come with it are more to do with age than marital situation. I wish we could have had adventures together. I wish I could have shown her parts of the world I’d loved. I wish we could have explored new places together.
It’s not youth that I miss, it’s time.
The context of the post below is not one of problems with Hanoi. It’s bigger than that or rather it’s an accumulation of lots of little problems coming to a head. Expats tend to blame everything on their location and yet sometimes problems are just problems.
As you get older the road less travelled is less travelled for a reason and yet the congestion on the other only makes it less appealing. In the end, choosing either requires a huge leap of faith and when there are two of you the stakes are twice as high.
Enough metaphors yet?
Just wish I could switch my head off.
The Dragon’s Deliverables
Posted: February 4, 2012 Filed under: Pics, Reflections, tet | Tags: learning vietnamese, life, tet 1 Comment »
My yearly dynamic has been much altered by the lucky break that is having both local and western holidays.
So two and a half weeks after returning from the UK for Christmas, it was time to Tet with another week off. We elongated that further with a couple of extra days in Laos, more of that later.
But the year of the dragon is upon us. The pics above and below were taken on a short walk around the assorted flower markets of Nghi Tam that spring up as Tet nears. It’s easy to see why flowers are so popular at Tet with everything else seeming so damp, wet and gloomy. Even with our dehumidifier running full tilt for days on end, when we unpacked our bags in Laos we realised that the clothes we brought with us were all wet. We dried them on the balcony before hanging them in the wardrobe.
This year seems like a pivotal one but then again they all seem to. Lots of resolutions – the top one being that I have to make a serious dent in learning Vietnamese. Currently work commitments mean that we both get in around seven, and that’s before we start on Cart business, adding language learning to that schedule is unthinkable so something has to give. And yet chipping away at this isn’t going to be enough – it needs a serious time commitment so something has to give.
My current design for life needs a few tweaks. Elsewhere, a little over two and a half years since I quit smoking, I need to use that same resolve to lose weight. Or rather it wasn’t resolve so much as something clicking in my head that made me put the last one out and not even want to re-light another. I need to see eating the same way. But no fad diet is going to do this – just a sensible and sustainable way of living.
So, both those are down here as a way of you and me holding myself accountable. In the parlance of my workplace HR, these are my deliverables for the year.
Like this:
Hanging around in Hanoi
Posted: November 1, 2009 Filed under: expats, Hanoi, Reflections | Tags: expat, Hanoi, job, life, money, working 4 Comments »
If you’ve been bored enough to follow my Twitter feed you might have noticed that earlier this week I went into work and resigned.
I don’t want to go into too many details about why but in short it was about employment conditions that made it increasingly difficult to live here both legally and financially.
I resigned with a heavy heart, because the job suits me just fine. It wasn’t meant as some kind of bargainning bluff. In fact, if I had thought for a second that I’d be talked into staying, then I probably would never have tweeted it.
But, after brief negotiations, I am now delighted to be staying in my post. I even found myself turning down extra hours so I could continue to work four days a week and have Monday free to pursue other activities.
I have used my freetime for freelancing to date and I have written some short pieces for local magazines but in doing so it was a reminder that at $30 – $50 a go you’d have to be writing a lot before you’d be making a living. By my reckoning you’d have to write one every day. It’s not the writing that’s difficult – it’s finding the opportunities.
Far better to have a day job and write for fun when the mood takes you.
Anyway – I have also promised to do a talk on social media for a local environmental NGO. I’m also meeting another NGO tomorrow. My take on it is this – I am happy to provide freebies for people doing good work. If more of my time is needed then we can look at covering some costs.
In the meantime, the phrase “bubbling over with chuffedness” made an appearance from me on Twitter this week and that’s pretty much how I feel.
Over emotional guff coming but… at one point last week I found myself scooting home on a perfect Hanoi morning and suddenly realised there were tears streaming down my cheeks. Pure happiness. Hanoi continues to move me.
Even when editing from home I’ve got into the habit of breaking up chunks of work with loud music – gleefully bedroom-dancing in lieu of more traditional screen breaks.
This all seems like a design for a very good life. For the first time ever I find myself not thinking about the future. I’m not counting days till a holiday. I am not planning “what next” while completing an overseas post. I am not even wishing for the weekend.
Meanwhile, after a slow start my social life is growing. I am making new friends and getting out a bit more. But I feel very patient about all of that. If all goes to plan then I will be here a very long time. There’s no hurry to do anything.
And now I am searching for a suitably punchy way to end this blog post.
Nothing’s coming.
So I’m wondering if being happy and non cranky makes for good blogging.
Hey, don’t unsubscribe just yet…
Life can’t always be this good.
